HOW IMPORTANT IS YOUR CONSCIENCE TODAY?

Voting Your Conscience - The Right Answer?

I've been pondering this concept of "voting your conscience" for a long time now. I am one who has been completely disgusted with the results of our national political process for many years now. As a nation we are allowing ourselves to be "hi-jacked" by an entire generation of political corruption masquerading as "progress" and "change". This progress and change are actually destroying our nation and the freedoms that we supposedly hold so dear.

Why is it happening?

Because very few of us are actually willing to study and learn the true principles that govern obtaining and maintaining true liberty and freedom in this world. This world and in fact our entire universe is governed by unchangeable principles or laws of nature that say, if you take this action, then this will always be the result. Those things are real. We cannot change them. The concept that there is no such thing as absolute truth, is one of the biggest falsehoods that has ever been perpetrated upon mankind. It is so misguided that it holds within itself the obvious truths of its own foolishness!

We can either learn to live in harmony with these true principles and bring great results upon ourselves or we can play with fire and loudly proclaim that they do not exist and that we can act any way that we want to and still get the results that we think will happen just because we say so. The only possible outcome of the second choice is a loss of our freedoms and our liberty.

So why this discussion on the eve of this election? Because I am still hearing so many of my friends loudly proclaiming that they are going to "vote their conscience" rather than vote for either of the two major candidates. Is that a legitimate, principle-based position to take? Many, many people think so. I happen to disagree.

Here's why.

At my age, I have had the distinct misfortune of living through two of the worst presidencies in the history of this country. Why were they so bad? Because they have managed to do more damage to the principles that this nation was founded on, which have produced an absolutely unprecedented amount of freedom at every level of society than ever before in the history of the earth. In their combined years in office they have introduced measures and violated powers that have set in motion forces that will ultimately destroy our nation and wipe true freedom from the face of the earth.

All of their misguided actions have been tolerated because they were done in the name of greater freedoms for one specific group or another or to protect us from ourselves. Both of these concepts are in direct violation of the true principles that govern real liberty.

Again, back to why I am so opposed to "voting your conscience"... Both of these presidents were handed the office because we had a major chunk of our voting population who were philosophically opposed to that candidate and would never vote for them. However they also didn't like the other major party opposing candidate either and couldn't "morally" bring themselves to vote for that one either.

Unfortunately both of these races were close enough that  when a large enough block of the potential supporters of the "lesser of two evils" candidate were distracted by the misguided notion of "voting their conscience" for a third party candidate who may have been a "morally" stronger person but who had no statistical chance of winning,...we effectively handed the most powerful office in the world to the worst possible person we could have put there.

I see that exact scenario developing again today.

Now anybody that knows me knows that morals are deeply important to me. What we must never fail to understand is that we must carefully watch ourselves to see that our "morals" are actually built upon a foundation of true principles and that they (our morals) actually bring about a correct result when we apply them. If when we follow our beliefs (morals) and they bring about a result that we really didn't want, then we must question whether we really acted upon a true principle or just upon our own personal belief system which, by its very nature, has the inherent potential to be flawed because we may not have taken the time to evaluate it properly.

If our "morals" lead us by default to place the person who is most dangerous to our freedoms into office because we pulled our vote away from the one candidate who had any chance of defeating them, then our "morals" and our "conscience" failed us!

The sad reality is that one of the two major party candidates WILL BE our next president, period...end of story. Like you, and almost everyone else I talk with, I am deeply disgusted with our choices.

In my never to be too humble opinion, one of them has a distinct agenda that will destroy this nation and the freedoms and liberties that its principles have created. The other, no matter how misguided and morally bankrupt they may be, at least believes that they are going to strengthen our nation.

That is a fundamental, philosophical difference that matters a tremendous amount to our future. 

The race is close enough that you can put the worst possible choice of the two into the most powerful office in the world by either voting directly for them or by "voting your conscience" for somebody who has no possible chance of winning and thereby drawing away your vote from the only person who could defeat them. It is as simple as that...period.

Now, I've got to address two critical arguments here.

First, the "lesser of two evils" - Many of my friends are attributing this comment to a certain person whom we all have a great deal of respect for. From everything I have been able to ascertain, this is a misquote. Besides that, I think I have made a reasonable argument to support that it is a principally flawed concept in the first place. Voting for the lesser of two evils still being a vote for evil, doesn't really hold water in the first place because many, many of our political choices boil down to that same scenario whether we know it or not.

The bigger answer lies in the real truth behind "voting your conscience".

The real place for exercising our "conscience" is in what we do in the next four years leading up to the next election. We as a nation should be working together to prepare a candidate who would be worthy of our vote because they actually understand the principles that govern true freedom and liberty. We also, if we truly have a conscience, should be doing everything that we can to educate ourselves, our friends and neighbors more on the true foundational principles of freedom and liberty.

Our founding fathers clearly stated that the freedoms and liberties that they put into motion for us could never be maintained by an ignorant people. Why? Because ignorance leads to selfishness, and selfishness opens you up to being manipulated by a more powerful group of people with an agenda that could destroy everyone's freedoms by deciet and false promises.

I hope you will ponder this thoughtfully and that it has an impact on what you do at the polls.

Besides that, I hope that you have an awesome day!

STOP HONORING YOUR FEARS!

Stop Honoring Your Fears!

What?

What do you mean HONORING my fears?

Yep! It's a real problem in our society. We have taught ourselves to honor our fears and put them on a pedestal to allow them to control our lives instead of doing everything in our power to rip them off of that pedestal and crush them under our feet!

I was reminded of this again last night as I was talking to some new friends and experienced an oft repeated scenario in my career of trying to inspire people to chase after excellence and their passions in their lives.

So often when I talk with someone about chasing after some great desire or dream in their life, I find them reluctant to do so. While the object of their desire, be it a thing or a purpose, is something that they really want to obtain or accomplish, they allow themselves to be held back from its attainment by some type of a fear.

These fears don't always manifest themselves as some big scarey obstacle that could easily be identified as a fearful thing or consequence. Sometimes it is a weakness, a lack of talent or skills, a lack of financial means or some other thing that impedes or holds us back from attempting to do something great or wonderful.

Still deep down at the heart of the matter, the solution to each of these problems is for us to push ourselves out of our comfort zone to develop a new skill. Or maybe to simply do the hard thing long enough so that we develop the ability to do it well enough and without fear and trepidation so that it finally becomes second nature to us and eventually becomes a new habit that begins to produce the desired results.

So often when I talk with someone about overcoming a challenge with their finances, I hear things like, "I just don't have time", or "I'm not a salesman", or "I don't like to talk to people".

Sometimes it's someone who really has a passion to serve the world or share some message, but they will bow to a "fear" of public speaking or a lack of money.

Other times it's someone with health or weight issues who says, "I'm just not the type who likes to exercise", or "I don't want someone to see me out trying to walk, run or ride my bike looking like this."

All of these things and many other excuses that we give ourselves and willingly accept from ourselves are literally fears or are based on things that we are choosing to say are more important to us than our desires or dreams.

We are literally sacrificing some of these these deepest desires at the altar that we have built to our fears.

We are giving those fears so much power in our lives that we allow them to become more important and powerful to us than the things which  are our hearts deepest desires. We are literally giving more honor or value to the obstacle than to our desired outcomes.

I challenge each of us to look around our lives right now and ask ourselves, "What are the things that are holding me back from accomplishing something great in my life?" "What fears or obstacles in my life have I given more honor to than what I am giving to my deepest dreams, goals and desires?" "Am I bowing at the feet of a fear or obstacle in my life rather than standing up and smacking it in the teeth and taking control of my destiny?"

Why do I ask these crazy questions? Because I am facing them just like you and every other human being is too. Our world today has truly unlimited potential and yet our society has taught us to cower before fear instead of standing up and confronting it head on until it gives up and goes away!

Smash the idol of your fear and the pedestal that it rests on! Stop honoring the unimportant things in your life and begin to give honor and allegiance to the dreams, desires and purposes that were placed within your heart by the Divine Hand that created you! Live your life the way you were designed to and never stop believing in your Divine Destiny!

LIVE A GREAT LIFE!

AMAZING KIDS!

Ten Keys To Amazing Kids!

Lately, Penny and I have been getting lots of comments about how much people love our kids and the positive influence that they are having on the families of their friends and neighbors. That is something that is deeply gratifying to a parent and has caused me to try to share some of my thoughts on how this has come to be.

First of all, lest anyone should think that I am assuming a "better than thou" attitude here, I hope that you will understand that we still have plenty of flaws and meltdowns! Just about the time when you think you are really something special, Heavenly Father has a way of gently reminding you that you're still not perfect!

Fortunately for us, most of our challenges happen within the walls of our own home where we can deal with them, hopefully, properly. We have found over the years that if we are willing to put up with the molding and shaping in the private moments of our own home, then when they go out into the world, they tend to actually perform in the way we have been trying to teach them. 

One thing that I will share about us is that we haven't just lucked out. We have been on a search from very early on in our marriage to find out if there really are some true principles that would govern raising great kids. Fortunately, over the years we have come across a piece here and a piece there and those ideas have all come together and born the kind of fruit that we were searching for.

So what are our Ten Keys To Amazing Kids?

I think you will notice quickly that we couldn't narrow the list down to just 10! The second thing that you will quickly note are that a huge percentage of these principles aren't really things to teach your kids to do, but instead, things that you need to work on becoming and doing yourself! Ouch!

Lastly, if you don't agree with something I say, think about this; if you are not getting the results that you want with what  you are already doing and someone else is, maybe it's time to really ponder why their thinking process is so different from yours? That could mean that maybe, it's time to let go of some long held paradigms of what we think is proper parenting. We have definitely had to do that ourselves on a couple of topics!

I promise you that very few of these principles were arrived at without some serious thought and searching and also some trial and error. Several of these ideas are even a vastly different direction from the one we started in. But we came up with them by trying one course of action and finding out that it didn't produce the results that we were looking for, so we changed... sometimes completely! 

So in no particular order and with very little explanation, (that would require a seminar!) these are some of the most important principles we have found.

First, get your priorities in the right order: God first, SPOUSE next, Kids third! Not kids before spouse except in very rare instances where the spouse is dangerous to the kids. In that case, find a new spouse! Be on the same team as your spouse!

Teach them Who and What God is, Who they are in relation to Him, and Why He went to all of the trouble to create this earth. Teach them what their ultimate potential to become is! If you don't know, find out! It's important! This one concept alone probably has more power to change the behaviors and outcomes of your family than any other single principle all by itself!

Understand your true relationship to your children. They are not your property, they are your spirit brothers and sisters and we have a stewardship to help them grow up learning how to become like our Father!

Get rid of all of your "Victim Mentality" thinking and teach them the same thing. Take total responsibility for all outcomes in your life. No matter who might do something else to you, the only positive solution is for you to own the problem and take responsibility for fixing it. No one else will ever fix it for you!

Examine your traditions and your paradigms about life and raising kids with a critical eye. Know WHY you do and believe WHAT you do and believe. Be willing to change when you find more truth.

Expect the best out of them, not the worst. They will rise to the level of your expectations. (Or Fall) Accept, Approve and Appreciate instead of Criticize, Condemn, and Complain! Be the Sunshine in their lives instead of the Rain-cloud! 

You can't teach self-discipline and obedience by teaching obedience and harshly disciplining them. What? The only way to truly teach them these things is by Inspiring, Teaching, Mentoring, Encouraging, Praising and Leading by Example. The way to teach obedience is to teach them WHY they would want to be obedient...to God! (It has an amazing upside!) They will obey you when they love and respect you and feel valued, not when they are taught to be obedient. Obedience is a gift that is given to one who has won your heart!

One of the most important chunks of parenting information that we have ever learned and applied has been "Personality Styles", "Love Languages" and "Love and Respect". These are vastly important! They are taught in 3 of our favorite books. ("Personality Plus", "5 Love Languages", "Love and Respect") Don't just read about them, STUDY them in detail! Repeatedly!

You can't have Quality Time without Quantity Time! Quality Time is and out growth of Quantity Time - Not a replacement for it!

Inspire curiosity in the world around them! Teach them to ask Why, What, How, Where types of questions about their surroundings.

Inspire them to READ, LISTEN, and ASSOCIATE to learn to grow. Read to them from inspiring stories not just entertainment books. Constantly read, learn and work on improving yourself! Consider paying them to read good books, (your list) instead of doing chores. Chores are a part of being a family not work.

Help them to associate with people who are pursuing excellence in their lives.

They need to see you pursuing a passion instead of arm-chair quarterbacking the world around you and them. Include them in a family goal and vision instead of just being the "soccer mom" to their every whim. It's okay for them to understand that the whole world doesn't revolve around them. (Nicely)

Find ways to work together on projects and make work fun and rewarding instead of drudgery. Teach them the joy of creating and becoming!

Make sure that their goals are really THEIR goals! Not just yours for them.

Teach them how to choose, set, pursue and accomplish goals. Start small. Teach them to be a finisher. Sometimes a goal requires course correction, but adjust and push through to the finish. Teach them to chase passion and purpose and let things be rewards instead of the main issue. What you become is more important than what you get. 

Teach them to be active, healthy and physically fit whether they do a sport or not.

As teenagers, teach them that great privileges come when they choose to Teach You To Trust Them.

When looking for more great parenting principles, only look to and listen to those who have fruit on the tree AND KNOW EXACTLY WHY they do! Choose to learn principles over strategies!

Like I said earlier, this subject could require a full seminar to really even begin discussing this subject adequately. Actually we could arrange to do that if it was important to you! Most importantly, don't take any piece of new info at face value until you have examined it carefully to see if it really is a true principle instead of just someone's pet theory!

Have an awesome day and Happy Parenting!

WHAT IS YOUR FAMILY'S LEGACY?

Within the last year I have attended the funerals of two of my Dad's brothers. Both of these have been wonderful men who, with their wives, have raised great families. Because we have lived several states away for nearly 30 years, our contact with the family has been rather sporadic. However, every time I get the opportunity to be with my cousins, (there are 24 of us) I am deeply impressed with the caliber of people who God has sent to this family!

All of us can trace our roots back to Edmund and Lucille Tapp and their ranch out north of Boise City, Oklahoma. Our memories of those times spent together as kids getting to know each other and forming lifelong friendships almost always go back to "The Ranch".  It is such a powerful memory that it seems like anytime we gather in Boise City, it almost always involves a trip back out to the ranch. It's like a time machine for us.

Why?

 Many of us, especially the older ones can remember many Christmases, Thanksgivings and summers spent there with Grandad, Grandma and each other. We rode horses, hiked the hills, and went on "cattle inspection" tours with Grandad in his trusty Scout to see the sights on this wonderful corner of our little world.

What was it about our experiences there that had such a lasting impact on so many of us?

While Grandad and Grandma might have had a few minor flaws, they were special people who did everything they could to create the foundations of something wonderful, and I believe potentially, very powerful there. They raised a family of 8 sons who have each turned out to be truly amazing men in their own rights. They also inspired in their 24 grandchildren a love for the land we live in and a driving sense of character that has created some truly amazing people as a personal legacy.

 Over the years, as I have visited with these cousins at various family functions, I never leave without feeling a deep sense of connection with them. In the last several years, this has grown within me to the point that I frequently ask myself the question, what amazing things could this family accomplish if we could all come together in a common purpose? The more I ponder that question, the more incredible that potential becomes!

That thinking process has inspired me to try to lead my own family in such a way so that we might build upon the foundation of the legacy that was handed to us and create something even greater with our generation. I have heard it described as having been born on third base and all that is left for us to do is to run home to accomplish something great!

All too often I see people who place no value on the legacy that they have been given. They live their lives without any real sense of purpose and when their lives are done they have either camped out on third base or even slipped backwards to second, first or even all the way back to the dugout!  They ultimately waste the legacy that was passed to them.

One of the driving, fundamental motivations in my life is to take this foundation that I have been given and to build upon it. I want to get better myself, to raise a great generation of offspring who are prepared to take this legacy to an even higher level, and to influence other people to begin to do the same with themselves and their families. I want to leave this world a better place for my having been here.

Almost our entire world seems to be so caught up in the struggle of just existing, that by far the largest percentage of us, end up settling for mediocrity in most areas of our lives, when, if we could just see it, excellence is actually available to us.

Over the last year I have begun having this discussion with some of my extended family and I am finding that I am not the only one sensing this. I am going to go out on a limb here and suggest that I believe that God put our family together here on this earth, at this time, for a purpose! He has laid a foundation through our ancestors that would raise up a generation of people with the character and faith to go out and have such a positive impact on this world that this legacy will resonate throughout the next several hundred years!

Alone, I see each of us impacting the lives of some of those around us in significant ways. That is why I believe that together, the compounded effects of our efforts could be exponentially greater.

What could be the Tapp Family Legacy of this generation? Could we, together, have an even more profound effect on this world around us? Could we become a powerful force for good by combining our talents, gifts and efforts in a common cause?

 Too often when we try to find companions for our causes we have to go out searching among the community and the world around us. Why not start with this group of people who already share a common foundational bond?

I would like to have this discussion with more members of my family. I believe that we have a mission here. If we would band together around the right principles, and gather the ability to influence more and more people around us, then the power of who we are and what we stand for could begin to radiate out from this core group to influence hundreds and even thousands of people in this world. I believe that we could ultimately reach literally millions! This world could be a much better place with the right influences. Why not us?

Every time I stand on that lonely, windswept hillside in northwestern Oklahoma at the Garrett Cemetery looking out at the amazing group of people gathered there to celebrate another great life, and I ponder the paths of those already laid to rest there, I can't help but ask myself the question...What If...? What could We Together accomplish?

Anybody up for a challenge?

I put that challenge out there to my own family, but what about yours? What legacy have you been given? Are you consciously looking to improve upon it? Maybe the legacy you have been handed is not one that you are proud of. Who's going to break the cycle and start something new and wonderful? Why not you?

Tell me what you think!

Personality Styles - A Foundational Principle

As I read and listen to people teach about how to learn the skills of dealing with people in an optimum manner, I always end up coming back around to how foundational it is to understand that there are different personality styles.

Why is that so important?

Because no matter what other principle you are teaching or attempting to apply, if you don't understand that different personality styles react differently to different inputs, then you are constantly stuck in the mode of trying to fit round pegs into square holes!

Your new principle works great sometimes. At other times it seems to work fairly well, and at yet other times it doesn't seem to work at all. Why? I thought principles worked all of the time.

They do! But often the application of the principle requires a tweak here and there to apply it properly to the individual's personality.

I have a situation going on in my life right now where I am working on a project with a friend who doesn't understand this concept. I know his heart is in the right place and that he is a great person, but there is a lot of friction going on because this principle is being violated each time we sit down to work together.

If we want to get optimum results in anything that involves dealing with other people, we absolutely must understand that there are core, fundamental differences in the ways people think, act and perceive the world around them.

As I speak with many different people about this concept of personality styles, I find that probably 75% of them have been exposed to the idea in one form or another. However, the more I learn about it and watch people try to apply it in their interactions, the more I become aware how important it is to delve into it more deeply.

Probably the most common mistake that I see is that we tend to view all of the other personalities from the perspective of our own style instead of trying to understand them from a more neutral perspective. That might sound complicated, but it is really at the core of applying this principle.

So where do we start? I always begin by recommending the book, "Personality Plus" by Florence Littauer. However this is such a deep subject that I believe it is important to dig into 2 or 3 other books to be able to learn more from different perspectives. Robert Rohm has another great one called "Positive Personality Profiles" that I really like.

Another great way to learn about it is to listen to as many audio recordings of people teaching about it as you can. They allow you to learn from yet another perspective of someone who is trying to apply the principle in their everyday life.

Dig into this concept and you will begin to see your interactions with other people in your life make a lot more sense!

Good luck and have an awesome day!

The Easy Way Out

I actually read two different thoughts this morning that really struck me! The first one was a quote that said, "Easy is the comrade of the timid!"

The second thought is that we are who we are, where we are and what we are today because of only two things, our thoughts and our choices!

It's too "easy" to blame all of those things on circumstances, other people, discrimination, our parents, the president, the list goes on and on. But the reality is that we are where we are today because of a series of thought patterns and choices that we have made that brought us here.

If we see our opportunities as limited, we need to look within ourselves for the solution rather than blame the world!
I read the story this morning of twin brothers whose father was an alcoholic. One became a drunk, the other became a highly successful businessman.

When asked why, each gave exactly the same answer, "Because my father was a drunk!"

What was the difference? Each one had a very different set of thoughts and choices towards exactly the same set of circumstances! Their thought patterns governed the ultimate outcomes in their lives based upon how they chose to view their circumstances.

One said, "See my heritage... I have no choice here."

The others response was, "Now I know exactly what I don't want to be like!"


I'll wrap up with this thought. If we always strive to take the easy path, our life will get more and more difficult over the years! But should we choose the more difficult path now with all of it's obstacles and challenges, our life will get easier and more rewarding as the years go by! Not that the nature of things will change, but that our ability to master the situations will increase dramatically!

Success in any endeavor always has a price that cannot be bargained! Happiness comes from finding out what that price is and willingly paying it ASAP!

Have an awesome day!

Nature or Nuture

One of my friends asked the question this morning if I thought we are who we are by nature or by nurture? Decided I'd share my thoughts for what they're worth!

Funny you should ask the question about nature or nurture because I've actually done a lot of study and observation along those lines. Here's what I believe.

I'm absolutely convinced that most of who we are comes from our environment; family, friends, surroundings, teachers, neighbors, TV, etc...

Did you ever watch a little kid who has a really bad attitude just like his dad for no apparent reason? You just look at him and shake your head because it's a total nonsensical reaction to a situation. Then you realize, that this is exactly how his dad reacts in a similar situation...and it usually doesn't make any sense when he does it either.

I've watched my own kids experience a new situation and make a judgement call on a person that really had no basis in fact. But I could see an immediate connection to a comment or action they had just recently witnessed from an influential person in their life. (not me of course, being practically perfect in every way!)

However with all that being said, all of our "nurturing" gets superimposed over our innate inborn personality style. There are 4 different types of personalities and dozens of combinations. So it's like watching the same movie on 4 different colors of screens!

I'm not sure that our personality has anything to do with genetics (having 8 kids, I think I can speak with a bit of authority here!) But I believe it it a character trait we brought with us from heaven!

Well, that's the short version of my answer, the rest of it would probably require a lengthy phone call at minimum!

Have a great day my friends!

Ideas Have Consequences!

Ideas Do Have Consequences!

In every area of our lives, our relationships, our families, jobs, businesses, communities, and nation, etc, those consequences show up!

This has been driven home to me with great force over the last several years. Everything that we are and have become in our lives up to this point is a direct outcome of the ideas in our heads and how we chose to operate accordingly!

Our success or failure in every area of our lives is a direct result of the ideas that we have allowed to be put into our minds.

As an example, we are mentoring a couple of dear friends right now who are struggling in their marriage. They are two great people with good hearts, but as we work through the challenges they have, they all stem from having some incorrect ideas about how a relationship should function. Those ideas have produced a set of very undesirable consequences in their marriage.

Think about the economic mess that our country finds itself in right now. It can be traced directly back to the application of some faulty ideas of both personal and national economics.

Every painful mistake, trial or challenge in our lives is a result of a faulty idea applied somewhere along the line in our thinking process.

Conversely, every victory, success, or positive experience in our lives comes as a result of stringing together a succession of correct ideas and acting upon them.

We cannot get positive, pleasing results by trying to build upon faulty ideas. It's just not possible.

One of the greatest problems in our society today is our unwillingness to accept that there are basic truths or principles that are unchangeable. They always have been and always will be. If we either willingly or unknowingly attempt to obtain a desired result in violation of those principles, it cannot happen.

A human being cannot jump off a cliff unaided by some flying device and think that they are going to arrive safely and without injury at the bottom. It cannot happen. It will never be able to happen because it is a direct attempt to operate while ignoring the principle of gravity. We cannot change that, no matter how much we want to ignore it unless we employ another idea like the laws of aerodynamics and create some type of device to allow us to harness those laws so that they also work in harmony with the law of gravity.

It's a lengthy discussion I know, but this point is critical to our happiness and growth in this world!

All ideas do have consequences, either good or bad!

In 1764 there were 4 young men in the American colonies:
     Thomas Jefferson was a young college student just suffering through a broken heart from being dumped by his girlfriend.
     John Adams was a young teacher, happy to be teaching and leading a nice comfortable life doing what he loved.
     James Madison was just a 12 year old kid, showing promise in his studies but extremely shy.
     George Washington was a young man trying to establish himself as a businessman and farmer.

A decade later, these four were leading a group of others to write and sign the Declaration of Independence!

A decade after that, after being victorious in their revolution, they were penning and signing their names to what has been called, the single most significant document in the history of the world, The Constitution of the United States of America!

Why? What changed a simple group of ordinary young men just like you and me into some of the "Founding Fathers?"

It was ideas! The discovery of, discussion about, then choosing to act upon correct ideas led to the creation of something monumental!

What about you and I? What is our destiny? Is there a mission out there that awaits us? Were we sent here for a purpose? How will we find out? Will we just wander through life and see what happens? Or will we set out to discover the true ideas that may lead us to do our part in this world?

Maybe it will just take one great idea to fix some significant problem in your life.

Maybe you have a company or family to lead.

Maybe you were called to do something important in this life and you haven't even glimpsed it yet.

What ever your destiny, remember, Ideas Have Consequences!

Come join our "Challenge Group" where we discover and talk about relevant ideas because reaching for our potential requires us to learn and grow!

Learn how to come face to face with the greatest minds in history in a quest for the truths that govern every area of life. Learn how they accomplished excellence in their lives through the pursuit of personal resolutions.

Sacrifice is the production of sacred things! True excellence comes from the sacrifice required to learn and grow!

Come join what has been called "The Great Discussion" throughout history, the discovery of and discussion about great ideas!

Try out the 90 Day Mental Fitness Challenge by clicking on the icon beneath our picture in the right hand column. You will be amazed!

Remember, All Ideas Have Consequences!

Come join us!

Have a Great Day!

The Search For Truth!

Finishing up the single best book I have ever read! (outside of the scriptures) It's called L.I.F.E. Living Intentionally For Excellence by Orrin Woodward and Chris Brady.

It is designed to make you think and man is it ever working! I've been reading it for several weeks now and literally every day, it gets me looking at my life from another direction and asking myself some significant questions.

Today it's got me thinking about how adverse we are sometimes to wanting to know and learn to apply truth in our lives!

I don't think that's even what I was specifically reading about but you know how one thought leads to another...

Why is it that we are so unwilling to listen to truth at times?

Usually because it upsets our carefully constructed little "comfort zone". Or as Orrin and Chris say, it's not really a "comfort" zone as much as it is a "familiar" zone because it usually isn't really all that comfortable, just familiar!

It really has more to do with our innate resistance to the principle of change than almost anything else!

That, for most people is probably the need to feel "right" about what we think in our own little inner sphere of who we are.

We are attacked so often from the outside world telling us that we are making mistakes or beating us down for one reason or another that we feel compelled to jealously guard our own little inner self image of who we are. That image is largely created out of our beliefs about ourselves and the world around us.

After all, how many of us just naturally think that everything we believe is wrong? Naahh...I don't think so!

So how does that play into the search for truth? Why can't we just operate from our current perception of things and be just fine?

The glaringly simple answer to that is...because there is truth in this world in all it's many different facets.

Isn't this obsession we have with "victim-hood" (and complaining about everything under the sun) in our world today a classic example of being unwilling to accept truth and adjust our actions to deal with it properly?

How many of us are looking around us and listening to the news and deploring the current state of affairs but are doing nothing but talking about it?

Isn't that exactly the same thing as any other form of "victim-hood" that we see in the world today?

Another example; here in Idaho (and many other places too) one of our favorite pastimes is complaining about the weather! Isn't that another form of "victim-hood"?

If we would really embrace a full picture of the truth...Don't like the weather? Then quit being a victim and...move to somewhere you do like it!!!

I know, I'm as guilty as the next person! I think I'll work on that one!

Let's explore another example. Suppose I was born with the genes to become 7'10" tall. Remember that the standard door height all across America is 6'8". So all of my life I would be required to duck my head every time I walked through a door or walk around with a permanent bruise on it!

At this point I can either accept the truth and learn to use it to propel myself forward and upward with my unique gift or I can continually proclaim my "victim-hood" and spend the rest of my life complaining about the unfairness and mistreatment I am required to endure because millions of thoughtless people refuse to change their doorways to accommodate me.

I can become a martyr to my cause by refusing to accept the truth of the situation around me . I can proudly refuse to duck my head when attempting to negotiate conventional doorways. I can proclaim my bruised forehead as a symbol of the injustices of the rest of the human race against me. I can seek to legally make the entire rest of the world conform to my particular set of circumstances.

OR...

I can accept truth! I was blessed with my own unique set of talents, abilities and circumstances from which to build my life. I can use my uniqueness to bless the rest of the world by my contributions to it. I can build on the truths I've been given and make my life a continual search for more and more truth to build upon!

When we learn to build with building blocks of truth, our walls will never crumble because of the cracks of imperfections in them.

The quality of our lives has a direct correlation to our willingness to seek out, recognize and act upon complete truths in the world around us.

Our lives and the world around us are full of partial truths that hamper our ability to excel in every important area of our lives.

Many of our problems arise from partial truths or even outright untruths in our view of the world around us.

Many of those mistaken ideas come from some of the most seemingly benign places. Our peers, our education, our family or ethnic or cultural traditions, our political or even our religious backgrounds can all be sources of some partial truths that are maybe even almost right...but not quite.

If you build an entire castle of belief and action on a foundation that has an occasional faulty block in it, can you begin to see how the integrity of the entire structure can be at risk of failure?

I challenge each of us to become avid seekers after real truth.

Learn to apply the same standard across the board to all of your beliefs. Often we hold different beliefs about different subjects that if we were to stack them up side by side we would find that we were applying an entirely different and sometimes even opposite set of standards to come to our conclusions!

Those are the hidden places that cause us problems in our lives!

You've got a left foot and a right foot that are similar yet different. It's like trying to run a marathon with a nice comfortable running shoe (truth) on the one foot and a fancy, 4 inch, spiked heeled, formal, dress shoe (partial truth, it's still a shoe) on the other!

It's going to cause you a lot of pain and discomfort because of the lack of wisdom in applying complete truth in both cases!

So here's the reality! Until we begin pulling the weeds of untruth out of our own lives and begin banding together as a community of people all dedicated to the pursuit of truth and right, we will never be able to fix our society today!

As long as the forces of untruth can keep us divided and grumbling among ourselves while they shout their untruths in organized unison long enough, they will win. It's that simple.

We need to be united in our pursuit of personal excellence based on truth.

Striving for excellence in every area of our lives is what allows us to begin avoiding the pain that comes from taking action on a faulty assumption.

Excellence in ourselves builds excellence in our families, which builds excellence in our communities, which builds excellence in our states, which leads to excellence in our country, which...I think you get the picture!

Learn more about the LIFE book by Orrin Woodward and Chris Brady on our Products page!

Have an awesome day!

Double Standards

I was pondering the other day why some people have such interesting belief systems in place in their lives.

I end up in discussions frequently with people who hold some really strong opinions about some thing or another only to find out that, if they really thought about what they were saying, that idea is not consistent with everything else that they say they believe.

It's interesting how easy it is to hold different subjects to different standards in our lives.

It's the old "Double Standard" idea. Or maybe "Riding the Fence".

I guess what it really boils down to is a saying that I love from a guy I listen to alot named Tim Marks, "I'm not going to try to tell you what to believe, I'm just saying to make sure you know WHY you believe WHAT you do believe!"

Sometimes when we really get down and think about what our beliefs are on any given subject, we should ask ourselves why we believe that way?

For instance, if we think that doing a certain thing is right or wrong, let's stop and look at the logic behind what we're saying and see if it's consistent with everything else we believe in life? Or are we just following a crowd of some sort?

Think about alot of our hot political topics today. Much of our conflict arises because some of us want to apply a certain standard of reasoning in this situation and that one but not in the rest of our lives.

It's okay to do this or that but if we dress the situation in different clothes we'd never agree to it!

Often it's OK for one segment of the people to verbally attack another, but if the second group responds in a like manner, they are accused of bigotry, hatred or fear-mongering, etc.

So let's make sure we are applying the same standards to all of our beliefs.

Seeking for truth is a much more healthy way to live than to have our poor subconcious mind trying to figure out our double standards and keep them straight!

Think about the why behind your beliefs and always seek for truth. Your life will go much smoother!

Have an awesome day!

The Power of Educating Yourself

In case you guys haven't figured out, I'm big on continually educating yourself!

I read one of the greatest paragraphs this morning describing why I feel that way. Thought I'd share it with you.


It's from Og Mandino's book, "The Greatest Miracle In The World". Here it is.


"For countless centuries man compared his mind to a garden. Seneca said that soil, no matter how rich, could not be productive without cultivation and neither could our minds. Sir Joshua Reynolds wrote that our mind was only barren soil, soon exhausted and unproductive unless it was continually fertilized with new ideas. And James Allen, in his monumental classic, 'As A Man Thinketh', wrote that a man's mind was like a garden which may be intelligently cultivated or allowed to run wild, but whether cultivated or neglected, it would produce. If no useful seeds were planted, then an abundance of useless weed-seeds would fall into the land, and the results would be wrong, useless, harmful and impure plants. In other words, whatever we allow to enter our minds will always bear fruit.


"Now (today) man is comparing his mind to a computer but his conclusions are the same as Seneca's and the others. The computer people have a phrase, actually an acronym, 'GIGO'...Garbage In, Garbage Out.' If one puts faulty information into a computer, out will come faulty answers."


Wow! Kind of hard to say it any better than that!


How often do we run into people who are spouting off "Faulty Information" and seem to be totally unaware of it? Could it be that they have allowed some "Useless Weed Seeds" to aimlessly fall into their minds and sprout and multiply into faulty conclusions?


The worst thing is that people like that don't even recognize that it is happening to them. They are content to go around embarrassing themselves unwittingly.


There is tremendous power in continually seeking for truth and filling your garden with the wisdom of the ages!


Have an awesome day!

Over-Reacting!

Penny and I were discussing a book we've been reading this morning. As we talked, I realized that anther idea was coming into focus! I was doing some research yesterday on marriage and divorce and came across something again that just seems to keep popping up.

It's this idea that when we encounter something we perceive as wrong, our natural human tendency is to over-react and go way too far in the opposite direction! What we should really be doing is searching for the truth and what is right.

We will never solve the problem by over-reacting to it, only by finding truth and applying the right answer!

I'll give you come potentially controversial examples because they clearly illustrate the point. Which is again, that aligning ourselves with truth is the only solution that ever completely solves the problem.

So let's look at three different situations that clearly illustrate what I'm talking about, that we are all familiar with.

First, a typical sibling clash at home. Second, the proper relationship of a husband and a wife in a marriage. Third, slavery and discrimination. Or almost any other social issue that we routinely argue about today!

In almost all of these issues, you will find the majority of people completely polarized on one side of the issue or the other, rather than seeking the truth, which normally lies somewhere in between!

Let's look at the typical fight or argument between our kids at home and then see if we have actually "grown up" as we examine the other two!

Typically, at my house, when I hear an argument start to escalate or someone start to cry, it goes something like this:

Waaah, he hit me! (a wrong action) Why? I don't know. I didn't do ANYTHING! (not quite the whole truth)

To the other sibling: Why did you hit him? He hit me first! I did not! It was an accident! Yes you did! He hit me on purpose! I did not! You did too! You were trying to hurt me! (still following me or do you already have this memorized?)

What really happened (the truth): "A" accidentally bumps into "B" maybe causing some pain or other problem. (original wrong action) "B" reacts with anger and revenge and hits back (usually harder) causing a downward spiraling fight or argument (over-reaction). Where was the truth? Who cares? As long as I get satisfied.

The reality is that the truth and the solution that would have made all parties happy was somewhere in the middle!

What about the proper relationship between husbands and wives in a marriage?

For centuries and maybe even millenia, misguided men and even entire cultures have treated women as second class citizens and even worse sometimes. (definitely a wrong action) Today we have morphed right through the push to get women equal rights and fair treatment into many women trying to treat men as second class citizens and neanderthals (over-reaction).

The real truth and the solution that brings real happiness and successful marriages is somewhere in the middle.

How about slavery and discrimination? Touchy subject? It doesn't have to be if we seek for truth and what is right here too.

Many of us, whether black, brown, red, yellow, or white, have ancestors who were slaves at one time or another in history. (an absolute wrong) What happens all too often in our world today is that we way over-react and although we all enjoy political freedom, we tend to divide ourselves up in groups and look down our noses at each other still. (another over-reaction)

The truth and the right solution lies somewhere in the middle again!

When are we all going to grow up and stop acting like little children and start looking for and acting on true principles that will lead all of us to happiness and success as a country?

The only way for us to overcome these problems is for us to understand that true happiness only comes when we put ourselves in harmony with the true principles that govern this universe! The funny thing is you can even enjoy the happiness that comes from this harmony without consciously aligning yourself with a principle! A principle yields results when followed simply because it exists! Interesting!

Put yourself on a lifelong quest for truth and act accordingly and your life will be constantly moving in an upward direction! But choose to try to fight against the truth and life will be a constant downward spiral!

Have a great day!

Divorce Statistics Translation!

We regularly hear that according to current statistics the divorce rate in our country is somewhere around the 50% mark.

That in and of itself is quite a sad commentary on the state of the value we place on marriage in our culture. But I believe it actually only tells part of the story.

Here are some other related factors to consider:

Out of that 50% who have divorced, how many of them went into marriage with an attitude of "We'll just see if this works out. If not, no big deal. We'll just go our separate ways"?

Then again, how many thought it was a joke or a whim in the first place? Zero sense of commitment or responsibility?

Then, how many went in with truly high hopes of a happy future of wedded bliss for the rest of their lives? Only to decide down the road somewhere that they were just totally "incompatible" or something similar?

Now on the flip side, let's look at the 50% who are staying married.

How many of those would honestly say that they have a truly great and fulfilling marriage? And how many of them are just tolerating each other to one degree or another for the "sake of the kids" or the commitment they've made?

Let's think of this in terms of a pie chart with some admittedly made up statistics here for the sake of an illustration.

Visualize a circle for your pie chart. If 50% of the marriages end in divorce, then we'll split it right down the center to form 2 halves, married on the right, divorced on the left.

Now let's divide up the divorced side.

Let's say that maybe 10% of those started out with zero sense of commitment to the concept of marriage in the first place. It was just something that sounded fun to do for a little while, but when we hit any bumps in the road at all, "we're outa here."

I'm going to put another 15% into the category of "yeah I like this person and it would be nice if it works out, so let's try it for awhile and see."

That leaves (and I'd bet this is fairly accurate) somewhere around 25% of divorcees who really wanted their marriage to work and intended that it should, but for whatever reason, they just couldn't figure out the correct dynamics. (Remember this group)

Next let's split up the married side:

I'd guess that there are maybe 10% of marriages that, if asked for a serious evaluation, would honestly say that they have a truly great and totally fulfilling marriage.

There will be another 15% or so who would describe their marriage as good, with some bumps here and there, but nothing real serious.

That leaves another 25% that are "tolerating" each other to a lesser or greater degree.

Maybe it's just an acceptable situation that may not be too bad, but it's not fun, enjoyable, rewarding or fulfilling anymore. But hey, we made a commitment and we intend to keep it come heck or high water!

It ranges from that all the way down to "we can't stand each other anymore but we're staying together for the kid's sake."

What this whole exercise in statistics tells me is, (First, about 85% of all statistics are made up on the spot to support your conclusion!!!) actually that we may be focusing on a smoke screen when we're looking at the divorce stats!

I believe that there are a huge percentage of marriages that we could save and repair and take to a whole new level of fulfillment if we could just teach them the unchanging principles that govern and lead to great marital relationships!

Will we save them all? I'm not that naive! But when you have 2 people of goodwill who just aren't getting along but really wish that they could, there is a huge reservoir of hope, if we could just teach them a few basic principles that most people never learn or are never even exposed to!

Here at the Marriage Mentors Workshops we teach 5 different core principles that govern success in any relationship you have but especially in your marriage!

So where ever you may find yourself on our "Pie Chart", if you are a person of goodwill, we invite you to come mentor with us!

Learn from someone who has been able to take our marriage to a whole new level of fulfillment because we learned some new principles and began to apply them in our marriage and family!

Come visit our Marriage Mentors Workshops blog for more info @

http://marriage-mentor.blogspot.com/

Great road trip!

30 hrs each way to Columbus, OH and back for a Leadership Conference with 3 friends!

Just for fun, I thought I'd share some of the highlights of what I learned. Some of my favorite thoughts.

When most people think of conventions, they think of a lot of rah-rah and hoopla. The reality is that there are some people out there who are combining some real, useful and practical wisdom with their fun too! Check out some of these neat thoughts!

First of all, why does studying leadership appeal to me so much? Well here's a definition that I really like that is really why I choose to pursue it myself.

"True leadership is the search for and application of truth in every area of your life. It's learning to live a principle driven life and influencing others to do the same."

I want to learn to be the most effective that I can at doing that. I still have a long way to go but hey that's what this life allows me to do.

Favorite thoughts:

Our cause is to lead people to truth!

Dreams come a size too big so that there's room to grow into them!

Change your label!

The fruits of the current starvation of our souls and minds from spiritual and mental nourishment are the social problems we are dealing with today!

All of the pundit's solutions we're hearing today are merely hacking at the leaves of the problem instead of digging out the roots!

God will put the right people in your path, but if you're not on the path yourself, you'll never run into them!

Until now there has not been an education system that teaches people how to recognize problems and solve them effectively. new ideas equip you to solve the problems in your life and help others to also!

This team will take responsibility for solving the problems of the world rather than passsing the buck to someone else!

Issues don't solve themselves, leaders do!

The more I read, the more I realized how messed up my thinking was. It was liberating!

The ability to fail and not quit is what creates lasting success!

I would rather be a player on a winning team, than the quarterback of a losing one!

An improved you is our product!

We're in a media war!

You're a champion the minute you leave it all on the field!

Let go of the "good" and grab the "great"!

Leadership is about standing in the gap!

A leader goes into battle when he knows a principle is in danger!

"Not on our watch!"

If you think your marriage is "OK", be sure to ask yourself if it's possible that Satan is blinding you to the whole truth!

How can we expect our wife to feel like a queen if we are treating her like a serf?

If our kids think they are the center of the universe, we're setting them up for massive failure later in life!

Guys, you are the quarterback in your homes. You are responsible , win or lose! You call the plays!

You can't correct your spouse to a successful marriage!

Marriage is something that you DO instead of something that you HAVE!

I'm grateful to be part of an organization dedicated to helping us get better in every area of our lives!