STOP HONORING YOUR FEARS!

Stop Honoring Your Fears!

What?

What do you mean HONORING my fears?

Yep! It's a real problem in our society. We have taught ourselves to honor our fears and put them on a pedestal to allow them to control our lives instead of doing everything in our power to rip them off of that pedestal and crush them under our feet!

I was reminded of this again last night as I was talking to some new friends and experienced an oft repeated scenario in my career of trying to inspire people to chase after excellence and their passions in their lives.

So often when I talk with someone about chasing after some great desire or dream in their life, I find them reluctant to do so. While the object of their desire, be it a thing or a purpose, is something that they really want to obtain or accomplish, they allow themselves to be held back from its attainment by some type of a fear.

These fears don't always manifest themselves as some big scarey obstacle that could easily be identified as a fearful thing or consequence. Sometimes it is a weakness, a lack of talent or skills, a lack of financial means or some other thing that impedes or holds us back from attempting to do something great or wonderful.

Still deep down at the heart of the matter, the solution to each of these problems is for us to push ourselves out of our comfort zone to develop a new skill. Or maybe to simply do the hard thing long enough so that we develop the ability to do it well enough and without fear and trepidation so that it finally becomes second nature to us and eventually becomes a new habit that begins to produce the desired results.

So often when I talk with someone about overcoming a challenge with their finances, I hear things like, "I just don't have time", or "I'm not a salesman", or "I don't like to talk to people".

Sometimes it's someone who really has a passion to serve the world or share some message, but they will bow to a "fear" of public speaking or a lack of money.

Other times it's someone with health or weight issues who says, "I'm just not the type who likes to exercise", or "I don't want someone to see me out trying to walk, run or ride my bike looking like this."

All of these things and many other excuses that we give ourselves and willingly accept from ourselves are literally fears or are based on things that we are choosing to say are more important to us than our desires or dreams.

We are literally sacrificing some of these these deepest desires at the altar that we have built to our fears.

We are giving those fears so much power in our lives that we allow them to become more important and powerful to us than the things which  are our hearts deepest desires. We are literally giving more honor or value to the obstacle than to our desired outcomes.

I challenge each of us to look around our lives right now and ask ourselves, "What are the things that are holding me back from accomplishing something great in my life?" "What fears or obstacles in my life have I given more honor to than what I am giving to my deepest dreams, goals and desires?" "Am I bowing at the feet of a fear or obstacle in my life rather than standing up and smacking it in the teeth and taking control of my destiny?"

Why do I ask these crazy questions? Because I am facing them just like you and every other human being is too. Our world today has truly unlimited potential and yet our society has taught us to cower before fear instead of standing up and confronting it head on until it gives up and goes away!

Smash the idol of your fear and the pedestal that it rests on! Stop honoring the unimportant things in your life and begin to give honor and allegiance to the dreams, desires and purposes that were placed within your heart by the Divine Hand that created you! Live your life the way you were designed to and never stop believing in your Divine Destiny!

LIVE A GREAT LIFE!

AMAZING KIDS!

Ten Keys To Amazing Kids!

Lately, Penny and I have been getting lots of comments about how much people love our kids and the positive influence that they are having on the families of their friends and neighbors. That is something that is deeply gratifying to a parent and has caused me to try to share some of my thoughts on how this has come to be.

First of all, lest anyone should think that I am assuming a "better than thou" attitude here, I hope that you will understand that we still have plenty of flaws and meltdowns! Just about the time when you think you are really something special, Heavenly Father has a way of gently reminding you that you're still not perfect!

Fortunately for us, most of our challenges happen within the walls of our own home where we can deal with them, hopefully, properly. We have found over the years that if we are willing to put up with the molding and shaping in the private moments of our own home, then when they go out into the world, they tend to actually perform in the way we have been trying to teach them. 

One thing that I will share about us is that we haven't just lucked out. We have been on a search from very early on in our marriage to find out if there really are some true principles that would govern raising great kids. Fortunately, over the years we have come across a piece here and a piece there and those ideas have all come together and born the kind of fruit that we were searching for.

So what are our Ten Keys To Amazing Kids?

I think you will notice quickly that we couldn't narrow the list down to just 10! The second thing that you will quickly note are that a huge percentage of these principles aren't really things to teach your kids to do, but instead, things that you need to work on becoming and doing yourself! Ouch!

Lastly, if you don't agree with something I say, think about this; if you are not getting the results that you want with what  you are already doing and someone else is, maybe it's time to really ponder why their thinking process is so different from yours? That could mean that maybe, it's time to let go of some long held paradigms of what we think is proper parenting. We have definitely had to do that ourselves on a couple of topics!

I promise you that very few of these principles were arrived at without some serious thought and searching and also some trial and error. Several of these ideas are even a vastly different direction from the one we started in. But we came up with them by trying one course of action and finding out that it didn't produce the results that we were looking for, so we changed... sometimes completely! 

So in no particular order and with very little explanation, (that would require a seminar!) these are some of the most important principles we have found.

First, get your priorities in the right order: God first, SPOUSE next, Kids third! Not kids before spouse except in very rare instances where the spouse is dangerous to the kids. In that case, find a new spouse! Be on the same team as your spouse!

Teach them Who and What God is, Who they are in relation to Him, and Why He went to all of the trouble to create this earth. Teach them what their ultimate potential to become is! If you don't know, find out! It's important! This one concept alone probably has more power to change the behaviors and outcomes of your family than any other single principle all by itself!

Understand your true relationship to your children. They are not your property, they are your spirit brothers and sisters and we have a stewardship to help them grow up learning how to become like our Father!

Get rid of all of your "Victim Mentality" thinking and teach them the same thing. Take total responsibility for all outcomes in your life. No matter who might do something else to you, the only positive solution is for you to own the problem and take responsibility for fixing it. No one else will ever fix it for you!

Examine your traditions and your paradigms about life and raising kids with a critical eye. Know WHY you do and believe WHAT you do and believe. Be willing to change when you find more truth.

Expect the best out of them, not the worst. They will rise to the level of your expectations. (Or Fall) Accept, Approve and Appreciate instead of Criticize, Condemn, and Complain! Be the Sunshine in their lives instead of the Rain-cloud! 

You can't teach self-discipline and obedience by teaching obedience and harshly disciplining them. What? The only way to truly teach them these things is by Inspiring, Teaching, Mentoring, Encouraging, Praising and Leading by Example. The way to teach obedience is to teach them WHY they would want to be obedient...to God! (It has an amazing upside!) They will obey you when they love and respect you and feel valued, not when they are taught to be obedient. Obedience is a gift that is given to one who has won your heart!

One of the most important chunks of parenting information that we have ever learned and applied has been "Personality Styles", "Love Languages" and "Love and Respect". These are vastly important! They are taught in 3 of our favorite books. ("Personality Plus", "5 Love Languages", "Love and Respect") Don't just read about them, STUDY them in detail! Repeatedly!

You can't have Quality Time without Quantity Time! Quality Time is and out growth of Quantity Time - Not a replacement for it!

Inspire curiosity in the world around them! Teach them to ask Why, What, How, Where types of questions about their surroundings.

Inspire them to READ, LISTEN, and ASSOCIATE to learn to grow. Read to them from inspiring stories not just entertainment books. Constantly read, learn and work on improving yourself! Consider paying them to read good books, (your list) instead of doing chores. Chores are a part of being a family not work.

Help them to associate with people who are pursuing excellence in their lives.

They need to see you pursuing a passion instead of arm-chair quarterbacking the world around you and them. Include them in a family goal and vision instead of just being the "soccer mom" to their every whim. It's okay for them to understand that the whole world doesn't revolve around them. (Nicely)

Find ways to work together on projects and make work fun and rewarding instead of drudgery. Teach them the joy of creating and becoming!

Make sure that their goals are really THEIR goals! Not just yours for them.

Teach them how to choose, set, pursue and accomplish goals. Start small. Teach them to be a finisher. Sometimes a goal requires course correction, but adjust and push through to the finish. Teach them to chase passion and purpose and let things be rewards instead of the main issue. What you become is more important than what you get. 

Teach them to be active, healthy and physically fit whether they do a sport or not.

As teenagers, teach them that great privileges come when they choose to Teach You To Trust Them.

When looking for more great parenting principles, only look to and listen to those who have fruit on the tree AND KNOW EXACTLY WHY they do! Choose to learn principles over strategies!

Like I said earlier, this subject could require a full seminar to really even begin discussing this subject adequately. Actually we could arrange to do that if it was important to you! Most importantly, don't take any piece of new info at face value until you have examined it carefully to see if it really is a true principle instead of just someone's pet theory!

Have an awesome day and Happy Parenting!

WELCOME TO MY NETWORK!

Welcome to my network of friends!

With some recent changes in our lives, one of the biggest of which is a move to a new city in a new state, I have been asking myself how I can best serve this new community that I am now a part of.

For the last 10-15 years I have worked on becoming a great connector in the lives of those around me. Part of the reason for developing a large network of friends and acquaintances is so that I can keep my finger on the pulse of what's happening in our community. By developing and maintaining great relationships with many people, I can put myself in a position to serve others by connecting them with the resources that can benefit them most at any given time.

For instance if  you or your friends are looking to buy or sell a home, I can serve you as a licensed real estate agent or help you to find someone who has more specialized experience in your particular area.

If you are looking for ways to innovate and improve in your business or professional life, I can connect you to a vast background of knowledge, experience and resources to help catapult you forward to greater success.

If you are looking to expand your client base for your business or profession, I would highly suggest that you make plans to attend one of our Business Mixer Events and connect with new friends from a different circle of influence.

Sometimes the connection that we find ourselves needing is to some new information that can help us solve a personal or family problem. As you read through some of our blog posts here you will find that this is one of our specialties. For several years now Penny and I have taught classes specifically for those wanting to find better information on Marriage, Family and Parenting challenges. Contact us to learn more.

Need a keynote speaker or an instructor for your next big event? We've been teaching for years on the topics of Leadership, Innovative Thinking, Relationship Development, Personal Growth and Pursuing Excellence!

Or...What other connections do you need to make? Let me see if I can help!

I encourage you to take a few minutes and dig through my "Live A Great Life" blog. I believe that almost anyone will find some principles discussed here that will enhance and expand their lives if they will ponder what is written and commit to dig in further and apply this new information in their lives.

Ponder the power of correct principles, consistently applied, over time! It has the potential to change our lives for the better forever!

I hope you will take the time to read and ponder the blog posts that I send out ever so often. My goal is to stay in touch with those in my network and offer them something of real value that will make my association with you something that will always be mutually beneficial and uplifting and who knows, maybe someday we will find a connection that needs to be made!

If you enjoy the blog please star or favorite this email so the following ones don't end up in your spam folder or better yet subscribe to the RSS Feed for the blog to receive it directly!

I look forward to developing a long and positive relationship with you that produces great fruit in your life! Have an Awesome Day!

Eldon